Surrender Michelle
So, here I am again 🙂 I build myself up, make changes, get better, healthier than ever and then take on the world again, testing my limits, pushing myself to the edges of my being and work through more challenges, expanding, growing, creating, flowing, loving.There are then more obstacles to help me break through my unconsciousness. I keep going until I have to admit, I can’t keep it up 🙂 I surrender to my physical/emotional limitations. I push myself until I have to say, okay, time to rest up again. I love myself enough to surrender, paradoxically so I can keep going, just at a more restful pace. My spirit knows limitlessness, but my body says, uh, wtf?
Inevitably I have taken “2 steps forward and 1 step back” as the saying goes, more or less 🙂 Grrrr. I’m not so good at patience, maybe I am a bit stubborn, I don’t want to give up, but sometimes I have to surrender. I allow things to be as they are because I am not capable to change them at this point anyway. So I trust and let go. Make space. I go back within, get quiet, slow down, rest up, restore and get back to whatever works. Small, gradual changes over time, to love myself back into a healthy state of clarity, renew myself by regrouping. Starting over again wiser and sufficiently renewed so I can explore, create, breakthrough, grow again. Becoming more conscious and loving all the while. Leveling up, though it assuredly doesn’t feel that way in the moment.
Surrendering to the whole, it always supports me, no matter what. All is well, even if I am bedraggled and feel defeated, I know deep down that I am always doing what I’m supposed to, it can be no other way. There is benefit no matter what happens, it is all purposeful. I am learning, teaching, growing and expanding love always, it is the nature of our beings, we can not change what we truly are in spirit. Refocusing on what matters most…and that is allowing the most joy and love to flow through me. my creations and relationships. Practicing the most loving ways of being.
These days I am concentrating on finding ways to work less and take care of my physical, emotional and spiritual well being. Being easy on myself. Gentle and kind. I need more quiet, solitude, simplicity, nature, meditation, sleep, more exercise and play. By working so much I have depleted myself. So much that the joy is sucked out of me, it’s not worth the price, but thus far I am at an impasse.
I believe most have financial challenges in their lives, it seems very common. There is so much information I encounter that tells me that it is because I have beliefs which block the flow of abundance in my life. Is that all there is to it? I don’t know, I think it’s not that simple? I believe it has to do with maintaining a loving view of self, gratitude, and healthy practices. And also to follow your bliss and if you do this, eventually the money will come, because you’ve found your groove where you serve the most. Could there also be other factors tied into agreements with others in your life? Like learning, teaching and growing in synchrony with others, like we are all playing our roles into creating what benefits the whole. So maybe struggles with finances are needed? Or is it that I am at cause for everything in my experience?
I am trying to empower myself, trust and keep believing that eventually I will get into the financial abundance and living my passion/purpose groove. I will surrender to the greater groove, heh 🙂 I mean I still have a roof over my head, food, transportation, health, am gradually paying my bills, am contributing with my work. I do enjoy my work. I feel like I am serving and am excellent at what I do. My relationships are better than ever. I have come a long way. I am fortunate. So much love in my life. I am just worn out, bone tired, weary.
I’ve had to make some unwanted changes, but maybe that’s also for the better too? Even though I can’t see it from where I stand now. I can’t see the whole, so I surrender. I choose to believe the universe has our backs, always <3
Surrendering is not giving up, it is admitting that you don’t have all the answers right now and to trust that whatever happens next is gonna be even better for you than what you had planned. Trusting that the mysterious forces are mixing up a magnificent mystical rhythm, a magical, irresistible groove. Surrendering to the universal heartbeat, yeah 😀 <3 I like that idea 🙂
Syncing up by listening within…to my logical heart 🙂
No lions, tigers or bears that I can see, gonna sleep in a field of red poppies for a few 🙂 <3 <3 <3 Sweet sleep my pretty, sweet dreams…sweet surrender <3
