More, Faster, Now! Not Me Anymore

The Logical Heart Knows Best

Every day I marvel at how fortunate I am. Of course some days I am less grateful than others, but overall I know how spoiled I am.

I have loving relationships, family, beautiful, wonderful amazing children, we are healthy and thriving. There are countless loving people I’ve encountered in person and virtually whom I am so grateful for, we’ve shared and helped each other along the way.

In the physical practical realm…

Grocery shopping is like being in wonderland. There is so much to choose from. I live in a beautiful apartment, there’s a pool, hot tub, gym, a club room with pool tables, large TVs, computers, a balcony with sitting area and a paved walking trail and green space where I can safely walk for miles.

We are surrounded by parks, biking trails and mountains. There is Denver with all its cultural offerings a 30 min drive away. We walk to work, it takes 2 mins. There is everything we could possibly need within 5 miles.

We have technology at our fingertips, computers, phones, instant access to knowledge and connection to people all over the world.

To me it’s science fiction come true.

I have abundance, most of us do in this country.

I feel like I only have first world problems and have a hard time taking people, including myself seriously when we whine and complain about trivia. Like people who get angry if they have to wait or if someone got their order wrong, or the store is out of the bread they like, so much that they’re yelling, cursing or giving death glares, lol 🙂

Man are we spoiled and bratty! Lmao 😀

We take so much for granted and always want more, more, more! The next new thingy, something bright and shiny, new, different, the novelty. That quick, immediate thrill. Instant gratification, the next fix, Something to fill that hole, the something missing, the never quite enoughness.

Maybe this new relationship, this new gadget, this new goal or accomplishment will satisfy that longing, will help me feel complete.

I want it now, I want more, no I want it all, but faster, no, faster, damn it that’s not fast enough, don’t you know that I deserve instant gratification?!!!

I need to speak to the manager! Lol! 😀

I’m so glad now that I’m older, I’ve outgrown that novelty seeking and consumption. I never get bored and know that seeking anything outside of me for a sense of wholeness or completion is a dead end or even a trap.

Everything we need comes from within us, we are already whole and complete. We only realize it when we stop long enough to be able to hear the truth whispering to us from deep inside, the logical heart. When we get tired of all of our mad searching, when the distraction no longer works, when we reach the point where only the truth will do. Then we discover that everything we wanted we already had, like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.

If I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn’t there, I never really lost it to begin with! Is that right? – Dorothy

I wish I could’ve found this out sooner, but now that I know, life is so much more relaxed, satisfying and peaceful. No more running on that hamster wheel to nowhere 🙂

I still want to see the world and enjoy its offerings, but now it’s not tainted with desperation, but deepened with appreciation.

Can you dig it? 😀

Michelle Miyagi
Hi! I was an RN, BSN in mental/behavioral health for 27 years. Now I'm helping empower caring people like me to prioritize themselves by maintaining healthier boundaries for more freedom, peace, and joy. I am also active in Long Covid advocacy.

Comments are closed.