The Logical Heart Knows Best

Another good day! Yay! This always happens, I don’t know how truly yucky I was feeling until I get better, lol. It’s like I forget how it felt when I was healthy. I adjust to being uncomfortable and keep functioning as best as I can, wondering if I’m just being lazy, lol, but I’m just sick!

For the writing assignment today I had to draw a mandala with the image from the last journal entry as the center. I haven’t drawn anything in ages! I used to draw all of the time when I was young, I love it. So my mandala has the stalk of celery in the center, lmao. That was fun! We had to name it too, I called it Tendril of Hope. Next, I must journal a story about the mandala for 10 minutes, will save that for tomorrow.

I’m now journaling a lot to improve my writing habit/skills. I have a dream (write my sleeping dreams), morning pages (write 3 stream of consciousness pages), and thankful for humans journal (write one entry a day about people I’m thankful for). Plus I’m doing other workbooks (The Firestarter Sessions, The Hero is You and Walking in This World)  and the One Year to a Writing Life.

I set up our extra plastic folding table on the balcony and journaled to the sounds of the swooping swallows, children laughing, chattering, riding skateboards and bikes in symphony with rumbling from the nearby highway and barking dogs. I deeply inhaled the mix of sun and cool air while devouring the sunset with my famished eyes. My naked calves delighted in the cool gusts of wind. I felt so spoiled being able to write outside sheltered in comfort and peace. My heart thrilled with warmth when passersby laughed and joked about their barking dogs, so tickled and happy.

I haven’t gotten all of my new routine completed today, but that’s okay. I cut Drue’s hair, I’m his new barber, lol. And I slept later than usual, but was up later too, we watched Penny Dreadful City of Angels and Insecure last night. It feels so wonderful to wake up with no alarms. I’m a fan.

One of my favorite parts of the day is opening the blinds in the morning. I feel like I’m opening a present every time. Even if I’m sick or really tired, it always gives me a jolt of excitement, expectation, and joy. I reflexively smile and then make my one cup of joe. Then I smile again because it smells so good. The first sip is always the best, so warm, the steam soothing my sleep worn eyes.

After I finished meditating the afternoon sun filled the room, it felt smooth, brilliant, fresh, and clean. I was transported back in my mind to times where it felt similar. A buoyant expectant starting something cutting edge and new feeling. Like when you arrive on vacation or when you’re enjoying something novel and adventurous. That shiny embarking on a magnificent journey feeling simmering from your heart. It’s like a premonition of the future, time warpy, another dimension shimmer. I did my best to make it last.

I’d cried tears of joy during my meditation, I’d just finished reading ACIM about receiving and giving thanks. I meditated on that. ACIM is so beautiful, it transports me in reverie. It keeps me peaceful and forgiving.

What a rejuvenating day. I’ll have more of these please (placing my order with the universe, lol).

Gonna go check the mail to get my new face masks. I have to walk across the complex so I’ve procrastinated, waiting until there are less people out after dark.

I’m anticipating more good days to come, making the best of it!

Michelle Miyagi
Hi! I was an RN, BSN in mental/behavioral health for 27 years. Now I'm helping empower caring people like me to prioritize themselves by maintaining healthier boundaries for more freedom, peace, and joy. I am also active in Long Covid advocacy.

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