Brave Enough

Now that it’s getting dark later, I’m blogging later too. I’ve been waiting to go for a walk at sunset because it’s more peaceful and it’s like being in a dream. The clouds glowing and shifting, golden, rose, purple, and then slate. It’s like visiting a museum called earth where the sky does performance art. I now have 13,831 photos on my phone, most are from my walks. I get to carry pics of masterpieces of nature in my pocket, how cool is that?

Today as I was doing my journaling and workbooks I wondered what I will do to make money in the future. The workbooks are asking me revealing questions, encouraging me to think bigger. I’ve got a lot more exploring and experimenting to do. It’s easy to get pulled into too many directions though, so I can’t chase everything.

I’d like to become a better writer and write some books for a start. The other things I’m interested in tend to be artistic/creative which would require more practice and skill-building. It would be nice to be able to incorporate things that I already have skills for, but it’s taking some digging to figure out how to translate those into building my own business that truly helps people for a win-win.

I did an exercise today that personified your inner censor which included drawing a picture of them and writing what they said in a humorous way, to make light of it. To shed light on our inner critic and show how petty it is all the silly things we tell ourselves that hold us back from doing what we really want. One of the things my censor said was “You’re gonna be so old that you look like Yoda before you get your business up and running, it’s taking you forever, you’re like a snail with a Yoda face, lame!” ?

It is taking me longer to do things, it does test my patience. Especially when a lot has to do with health issues which are sometimes trickier to deal with. Everything is interconnected, so I have to address all of these aspects simultaneously, so there has to be a rhythm and balance to it all. It’s like the art of being human, lol. You get one thing smoothed out and then you call out, “Next,” and fix the other issues that pop up, triaging until you’re all patched and smooth sailing for the time being.

Thankfully it’s getting smoother here. It’s so nice that I don’t want it to end. But eventually, I need to make some tangible progress here, tick tock tick tock, lol. Eating berries in the sunshine is lovely, but one day I won’t be able to afford the berries, this wave I’m riding won’t last forever. Gotta build my surfing skills so I can catch those bigger waves.

I’d love to write letters from the balcony indefinitely, but that’s not gonna buy me berries or a new surfboard either. Next quarter I will dive into learning about how to create a variety of content and how to market and sell. All of the tech stuff is intimidating to me though. I’ve got to at least try.

My goal is to have the Facebook social learning group done by the end of June. That will feel like a step in the right direction. All of the workbooks I’m doing are helping me to discover who I am now because I’m a vastly different person from when I began this blog. Ideally this will point me in the right direction. And by creating content and getting feedback I can then adjust accordingly until something clicks.

It sometimes feels like I’m attempting to pull something out of thin air, building it from the ground up. With lots of trial and error until something begins to gel. Lots of false starts and discards ? It’s challenging trying to build a business on the side while you’re working fulltime in another career. I don’t know how others manage to pull it off. I’m so thankful I’m now getting the chance to invest my energy full time in this pursuit.

It’s kind of scary though because there’s really nothing stopping me. Time to level up, do I have what it takes? Yikes! I calm myself by saying, baby steps first, then later you’ll feel brave enough to run! It’ll be fine. Keep going. Keep practicing until you improve. Just keep at it.

So I am