What’s It Gonna Take?

It’s so heartbreaking, frustrating, and infuriating that we continue to suffer the same repetitive issues in our society. I wonder when we’ll ever reach solutions or if we’re doomed to have history keep repeating itself?

It’s horrifying and tragic, racism, violence, and hate. How terrifying it must be for so many people, to know that you are at high risk for targeting, for harassment, abuse, injustice, incarceration and even death for no other reason than the color of your skin. To be treated as an object to be used, abused, tortured, consumed, and discarded or killed because of those who feel entitled and have the power to get away with it. Then when people rise up, protest, and things get out of control for varying reasons, the ones in power focus on that instead of the real issues of racism and social injustice.

On the surface, it appears that progress has been made, but with all of the racism and inequities that have been unveiled since 2016 and most recently by the pandemic, I wonder how far we’ve really come? It’s so appalling that we’re still at it. What’s it gonna take? How can we all take care of one another so that we don’t have to keep doing this?

I as a mother can’t imagine how it must be knowing that your children could be targeted, harmed, and killed at any time for no reason because of their race. Though I’m Asian, my kids don’t look Asian. My daughter wants to go to the protests, she’s in New York. She’s been to other protests in the past. I was worried about her, but she’s grown and has to do what she believes in. I’m so proud of her, but it’s even riskier now with all of the unrest from the pandemic, plus the chance of contagion, and there are multiple factions inciting violence including the police.

She said that because she looks white, her presence helps protect others who aren’t, she’s like a buffer. When the police get aggressive, the white people form a wall of protection and it stops the police. Wow.

I worry about gun violence. If someone decides to start shooting the color of your skin won’t protect you from random bullets. I have to tell myself to stop thinking about it and let it go. But deep down, I don’t want her to put herself at risk and I wish that no one else did either. But how will things ever change if we just sit back and do nothing?

The kids and I Skyped and expressed all of our concerns about the state of the world. It’s helpful to have conversations, it helps us get clarity, offer support, and discuss possible solutions and ways we can help promote change. I see that some people really aren’t aware, but are open to learning and others are willfully ignorant or maybe they just don’t have the intellectual capacity to understand anything other than what’s already been ingrained in them or they’re afraid of change and they don’t want to lose their power.

Some are full out racists yet can’t see it. Those are the people that I don’t waste my energy on, you can’t have a conversation, don’t even bother. They won’t be changing their minds about anything. And we are all biased to some degree by our social conditioning. We all have our blind spots. So it’s always a good idea to stay open, curious, and inquisitive so we can become aware of our blind spots, especially when someone tries to point them out to us. Instead of becoming defensive when confronted, maybe it would help to pause and question staying open to another’s perspective and the possibility you didn’t know everything after all. To let go of that ego and pride, you may be mistaken in your beliefs/perspectives, but it’s okay, there’s a chance to change and make it right, make it better. We all make mistakes, we can always correct course and do better.

Our country, our society, and the world needs to do better. I hope all of this shit hitting the fan helps us clean up our messes once and for all. I don’t know what to do except donate my time and money to worthy causes. I used to believe that voting helped, but not so much anymore. I try as an individual to do my best. I have ideas about what would help, but I can’t magically create that all by myself.

I grew up in Louisiana and am so thankful to be out of there due to the racism, backwardness, and oppression. There are people I went to school with and they’re racist as f*** and don’t even know it. It’s so bizarre. I just don’t get it, they’re stuck. And it appears that’s how we’ve been as a whole in the USA too, stuck and racist as f*** ?

How many generations until we get it right. I hope it’s soon. I guess that’s why the investment in SpaceX, to find a place to escape to, lol. What can I do to make the change for the better go faster! What can we do?

I’m at a loss and feel so sad for everyone.

Michelle Miyagi
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