The Logical Heart Knows Best

I wish I were lounging in a hammock at a private beach, reading a riveting book, sipping a cool citrus drink while the sound of the crashing waves washes over me, yeah ? I’d take a nap until I feel a gentle caress on my forehead, brushing my hair back, I want to purr, mmmm. I open my eyes and (insert your crush of the moment) is peering down into me, a sheepish grin lights up their face. I grab their hand and slide out of the hammock, we walk arm in arm along the water’s edge, I lean in closely my head nestled against them as the sun glows low in the sky. We stop to watch a mother and daughter flying a yellow kite. We marvel as it soars higher in the velvet pink sky.

We don’t speak, it’s too overpowering, the ocean swoon holds us in a trance, we want this day to last forever. They stop, grab my waist, and engulf me with a deep embrace. I feel my chest swell with warmth and all else fades away. All I feel is love bubbling me senseless as I bury my cheek against them my arms enfolding, so warm, like home. The wind whips our hair and clothes, flap flap flap, a storm is brewing out at sea. We stroll back towards our seaside cottage, the sand squeaky, and cool against our feet. Ghost crabs scuttle out of our way as we near the steps. Chirp chirp, the crickets sing their nightly chorus. We’re at our little wooden cottage and pause before we enter, our eyes catch, I smile, lower my eyes and move closer, they lift my chin, now both of our eyes are closed, they lean in and….smoochie woochie!

Lmao. Enough of that, it’s fun though! I do wish I were at the beach, I can smell the Coppertone, I love that scent. What is that fragrance, orange blossoms? One of my favorite things is blowing bubbles at the beach, I love the prismatic colors and reflections in the bubbles, it’s mesmerizing.

I grew up going to the ocean in the Florida panhandle most years and continued that tradition as much as possible as an adult. We were last there in 2018 after our son graduated high school. It feels so long ago now, so much has happened in a short time frame, time psychology is freaky. I wonder when I’ll get to vacation there again? The ocean in California is closer to me now, maybe we can try that out one day and stop off at Disney along the way. I’m fantasizing about traveling, it’ll be so wonderful when we can again. I’m looking forward to all of the freedom and adventure that awaits. It’ll feel all the sweeter once that time arrives, yay!

Today was the filming day for Life in a Day by Ridley Scott and Kevin McDonald where people from all over the world upload video they recorded from today. So I uploaded a short video, it was fun. It asks you to answer 4 questions, what do you love, what do you fear, what do you wish you could change and what’s in your pocket? And you just record what you’re doing that day. I haven’t been doing a whole lot, it would be a very boring video of me tinkering around the apartment, lol. So I just answered the questions and said what I’ve been doing.

I’m tempted to do another Ignite Video Challenge because a lot of friends are participating, but I’ve already done it before and it’s time-consuming. Instead, I will make my own videos for the Facebook course I’m building. I like making videos, but I have to make myself do it though because it’s still a stretch for me and out of my comfort zone. The video marketing course should help me get better with that.

I’m loving being able to take online courses and build skills. I’m having to slow it down, my research, workbooks, books, and projects are piling up. I need to complete what I’ve started first before adding more. I’ve been a bit greedy like I’ve been starving for this opportunity to explore for a long while. I want to do it all at once!

In between my greedy explorations, the ocean calls to me, and fantasies fill my daydreams. Then I imagine driving up in the mountains to see the wildflowers. I’ve been wanting to go ever since we moved here. Then I remember that I need to get the tires checked first before we take a longer drive. Two of them keep losing air, slow leaks. I don’t want to go and risk exposure, so I procrastinate. Eventually, I’ll get it done. I don’t feel like driving far now anyhow, I get too fatigued afterward.

I’ll keep daydreaming, it’ll be a substitute for vacationing. I can always get a blow-up pool for my balcony, slather myself with Coppertone, splash around and blow bubbles, heh. Fun! Here’s to when we can vacation again! Cheers!

Michelle Miyagi
Hi! I was an RN, BSN in mental/behavioral health for 27 years. Now I'm helping empower caring people like me to prioritize themselves by maintaining healthier boundaries for more freedom, peace, and joy. I am also active in Long Covid advocacy.

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