Now & Laters with Doritos?

I got everything set up for the Nintendo Switch all by myself and began Animal Crossing. I have an island and a tent, lol. The game is adorable! I can’t wait until I can go visit my daughter’s character. To get to the airport, I need to get enough completed and points. I downloaded the free NES and Super NES too, yay! I can play some games from way back in the olden days.

For the upcoming cold months, I’m getting everything set up for being indoors even more. I also want to get things squared away before the holiday rush so we can just hunker down. I was looking at the apartment layout, wondering where we’d put the Christmas tree, lol.

I spent time on the balcony today and dead-headed the zinnias, wiped the porch down and rearranged things, and swapped some tables so there’s more floor space. It was satisfying. The warm sun felt good.

I read the CDC has stopped all evictions until the end of the year. What a relief. I was envisioning multitudes of unhoused people and how could we let that happen? That’s some good news for sure.

I can hear crickets chirping. It’s so soothing. I love crickets and insects. I’d post more pics of them on this blog, but I think it is disturbing for some people, so don’t. When a cute bug crosses my path, I like to get a close-up of them. I don’t catch them anymore, except if they’re in the apartment, I’ll catch and release them to save them. We have a cup and thin, firm piece of paper allocated for bug rescues sitting on top of the refrigerator. When I was younger, I loved catching them, examining them, and then letting them go. As I got older, I realized how mean that was to them, so I stopped.

I also became vegetarian and eventually vegan, as I’ve gotten older for the same reason. I don’t want to contribute to more suffering in the world. It’s also healthier and better for the environment. I’ve had no ill effects or deficiencies so I keep eating vegan. As time has gone on, it’s become more mainstream, so when I want to indulge in a comforting treat, there’s usually a vegan substitute. But then those treats aren’t as healthy, so I have to practice moderation. Being vegan doesn’t guarantee a healthy diet because there is so much processed vegan food available now.

I remember when I was a kid, we’d walk to the store and get all kinds of junk, now and laters, wacky wafers, bottle caps, fun dip, ring pops, bubble yum, icees, doritos, powdered donuts, funyuns, jolly ranchers, laffy taffy, cheetos, wax bottles, sweet tarts, giant pixie sticks, zero bars, nestle crunch bars, reeses, blow pops, etc. and we’d eat that mix and get that film of yucky gross taste coating out mouths, lol. Now and laters and doritos don’t mix well, lmao. I’m so glad I don’t do that to myself anymore, heh. We had fun though!

I still get candy sometimes. It’s associated with fun memories and brings me joy. I believe we need to indulge ourselves in moderation. I don’t like militant anything unless it’s absolutely necessary, or it’s an ethical choice, like veganism. I find with food, the more restriction, and rules, the more tempting things become, along with overindulgence, when finally getting a taste of the forbidden. I prefer intuitive eating.

https://www.intuitiveeating.org/10-principles-of-intuitive-eating/

Geneen Roth and Martha Beck have some good books on this subject.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/39173.Breaking_Free_from_Compulsive_Eating

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/74818.The_Four_Day_Win

My relationship with food has improved vastly over the years and I’ve made peace with it mostly. Negative thoughts still creep in but I quickly shake them away because they don’t help at all. Most women struggle with food, weight, and body image because of our social conditioning.

It’s blared at us 24/7. Ways to be more beautiful, more thin, muscled, fit, more glamorous, try this diet, this cosmetic, this treatment, another potion, supplement, etc. to achieve this one more thing towards perfection and you’ll be living the dream.

There is more momentum towards body acceptance, empowerment, and agency over our bodies, but there’s still that social pressure to conform to what society portrays as the ideal, healthy body. There’s the emphasis on the physical and external attributes of a person where people are always comparing themselves to others and feel the pressure to live up to an often unattainable level of perfection. It’s very unfortunate and causes so many problems like eating disorders, anxiety, depression, suicide and decreases overall life satisfaction. It’s a big business though, so there’s no end in sight.

I wish I would’ve had the sensibilities I have now when I was younger. What a waste of energy, all the agonizing, the compulsive exercising and dieting, the eating disorders, the low self-worth, for what?

It’s not what’s outside that counts, but what’s inside and how you live your life, your quality of life, and how much meaning, joy, and loving memories you create. You can still be healthy and happy without succumbing to the traps of seeking perfection. I eventually became okay with what my body naturally wanted to be. I stopped trying to make it into something that would take a herculean effort to attain. My body is temporary, my soul is eternal. I learned to satisfy my soul instead of trying to micromanage the external and my body. That was getting me nowhere. I learned my inside was what I needed to tend to the most. After that, everything got better.