Impeccable Care

Day 267 🙂 99 to go. I spent most of the day prepping food, cooking, and baking, it felt good. I baked two different recipes of vegan chocolate chip cookies to send to my daughter, plus some vegan pumpkin blondies. Of course, I had to sample them, yum-yum! I’ve got her goodies and various fun, cheery, festive things packed, but I want to add a few more items because there’s still space left in the box, it must be filled. That means I have an excuse to make a store run tomorrow, yay!

I’ve been active all day except for a short afternoon nap, (it was glorious). I wanted to go for a walk, but somehow that turned into a nap, lol. I feel really good tonight, that’s so encouraging. Maybe I’ll be in the clear now and can resume my normal level of activity?

The hand rash is barely there, the best it’s been since February. The trigger finger continues to improve, mostly the joint is stiff and it rarely gets stuck anymore. I do have to stretch it frequently if I’m holding my phone, the mouse, or the game controller for prolonged periods. The chest/nasal congestion, headaches/sinus pressure and fatigue have diminished to better than they’ve ever been since February too. My feet, hands, and nose still get uncomfortably cold at intervals, but that has greatly diminished as well. The tachycardia and shortness of breath have also significantly diminished.

Maybe, just maybe this is the end of this post viral stuff, I hope? I’ve been fooled so many times though, but there’s got to be a time when victory is mine, right? Also, the MdDS symptoms continue to improve, the med and PT are helping. Might I be close to my old self in time for my birthday at the end of October? That would be the most magnificent BD gift ever!

I practiced guitar today and danced to one song, I have a drawing left to do after this and one more set of PT exercises. I finished listening to a book today and have an hour left in another. I’m trying to catch up on my Goodreads reading challenge.

I really want to go to the thrift store, but I don’t want to risk getting sick, so I restrict myself to grocery shopping. I would be so furious with myself if I got sick from a frivolous activity. I’ve had enough of being sick, I want to do everything in my power to safeguard my health. I’m finally having the chance to restore it, I will not sabotage my progress by taking unnecessary risks.

I’m really happy I added guitar, drawing, and dancing to my routine, it lifted my spirits today. I feel like I’ve made so much progress recently with my health. I needed to totally stop pushing myself so hard, to stop pressuring myself to constantly add more so I could make faster progress towards other goals when what I really needed was to take a break from it all so I could use that energy to restore my health.

I’ve noticed over the years that the best way to get healthier is to let go of it all, make a lot of space and breathing room so there’s the freedom to relax, to just be in peace. It’s all that striving and wanting to be more, to do more, to constantly improve and achieve… that not ever enough mentality that can backfire. Instead of moving me forward, it’s oftentimes kept me stuck or worse, negatively impacted my health.

It’s hard for me to remember that because logically I think that constant progress towards my goals, powering through even when dealing with health issues would be beneficial. My mentality is that I can’t let anything stop me, but now it’s clear to me that when your health suffers you do have to stop and do what it takes to get your health back, even if that means a lag in progress towards your goals. You can’t reach your goals if you’re dead, lol.

Plus it sucks to feel crappy all of the time when you’re trying to push through, gimping along when in reality you’re only prolonging the time it’s gonna take to get better because you’re stubbornly trying to hold on to getting things done, to some normalcy when the best thing to do is surrender to taking impeccable care of yourself so you’ll get better faster.

Idk, even when I’m feeling poorly I don’t want to miss out on living life fully, it’s like when I was little and would resist sleep, I’d fight to stay awake because I didn’t want to miss out on anything. It’s the same way when I’m ill, I fight it 🙂 Sometimes it works, I stave it off, shake it off, but other times I’d do well to give in because that’s what’s needed. So it’s trial and error, playing it by ear. Me thinks that the older I get, it’s best to give in and take it easy until my body says go again. I’m so wanting my body to say go! Soon body, please?

Time to do a drawing and my last set of PT exercises, woot 🙂

Michelle Miyagi
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